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Apparently a mop is an exciting contraption if you are a kitten. For me, not so much. This morning our two adolescent cats followed me around the house in a state of rapt attention, their eyes glued to the mop in my hand. Though it may have been my imagination I thought I heard feline chuckling. Sadly, I am not nearly as skilled at the art of mopping as my larcenous ex-housekeeper…. Read More

The silverback hesitated, watching us intently from behind a screen of foliage. He then seemed to make a decision and began moving toward us quickly. His size was intimidating, roughly 450 pounds we had been told by our guide. Trust me, that’s BIG when you’re up close. Our rules had been clear: maintain a minimum distance of seven meters from the gorillas. This big silverback didn’t seem to care about the rules. He… Read More

My mind loves to show off its fabulous memory. It’s forever sifting through its files and making grandiose judgments: the food in this restaurant used to be so much better than it is now. Sunsets are way better in Bali. Oh my God, this beach is crap — remember Champagne Beach in Vanuatu, now THAT was a beach. Wow, she’s just DESTROYED her face! On and on my mind goes, always flaunting… Read More

“Ma’am, you need to come over here now. Edward has died”, said my husband’s live-in housekeeper over the phone, almost exactly two years ago today. Edward and I had not lived together for several years, but we were still legally married. I had planned to visit him in two days’ time. Now he was dead? My knees buckled and I had to sit down. “What happened?”, I asked. “I don’t know, Ma’am,… Read More

Wow, lots of you guys are dog lovers!! I’ve had so many messages during the past month asking how Private Ryan is doing and I thank you for caring about a dog that one Englishman in my neighborhood recently told me “needs a bullet”. Well, the answer is: Private Ryan has developed a small belly during the past month! He also has much more energy than he used to have, but his… Read More

Yesterday I experienced a coincidence which I have since decided was “a sign”. Yesterday was the anniversary of my Aunt Bonnie’s death from cancer six years ago, a date which is probably remembered by almost every member of my family. Though I have hundreds of wonderful memories of Aunt Bonnie while she was alive, I have to admit that when I am reminded of her now I mostly think about her tombstone… Read More

He’s not much to look at right now and maybe he never will be. The fact is, he may not live through the week. But then again, he might. I’ve named him Private Ryan because he’s in a battle to survive and he definitely needs saving. Private Ryan lives in my neighborhood, though in an area where I rarely travel. I saw him last week and was horrified and angry. “Oh, you… Read More

The Filipina maid walks into the living room, interrupting the conversation between India and her husband, Edward. “Sir”, Leah says to Edward, while looking at India, “the woman is here for your blow job.” India is not surprised by this announcement, though she thinks that one o’clock in the afternoon is an odd time to be having oral sex. The day is blistering hot. Who feels like copulating in this weather? She… Read More

I recently signed up for a 10-day landscape photography workshop in Iceland. This is something I should not have done — or so my brain warned me. But my heart disagreed. “You’re too busy”, said my brain. “Have you forgotten that you’re going back to school? The timing could not be worse. I hate to say it, but you’re insane.” “I don’t care”, said my heart. “I really want to go to Iceland.”… Read More

I received no Christmas gifts this year — unless I count my new milk frother, which looked very much like a gift in its festive holiday bag. But since I bought it myself on the way back from Hong Kong last week (the best $100 I’ve spent in a long time, by the way) — I don’t think it counts. And in a rare effort to be practical, I chose not to put up… Read More

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